Time to get this New Year started off right...

Sorry to not have been around as much lately. I have been either fatigued and feeling ill from the chemo or busy getting a few things done when I do have the energy and motivation. First off, happy new year! Beth and I laid low and ventured out around 11:30 PM to find a spot to watch the Space Needle firework show, the linked picture is not ours. We found a spot under the north end of the I-5 ship canal bridge where we joined a group of local revelers and watched all 8 minutes from a distance. Beth attempted to take pictures but the batteries went dead after only 3 dismal pictures. Don't worry, we got started on our new year right because we were home by 12:15 and in bed asleep by 12:30! I was actually surprised I made it that late, but I was bound and determined to do something since I can't hit the parties like I used to. It seems like everybody has colds or worse these days and its not worth the risk. Not to mention, it seems like you have to spend a fortune just for 2-3 hours of fun anymore. Ahhh, life in the city, whats a small town boy supposed to do?!?

So I have been feeling ill in my guts lately and I know it has to do with the chemo. I am told the toxicity from the carboplatin builds up over time and it does affect the intestines. I saw Dr. Sodhi yesterday and he wants me to eat more fruits and yogurt and keep on drinking the water. He could tell I was taking a beating from the chemo just by looking at the color of my skin and the looks of my tongue. I have been dealing with those little sores that develop in the mouth as a result of the chemo. The lining of your mouth and guts are rapidly dividing cells themselves so they too get wiped out from the chemo. But, as I have told others, I am young and healthy enough to take one hell of a beating, so bring it on. As long as the cancer gets hit as hard as the rest of me does, then the chemo is doing a great job! While I haven't felt nauseated, I did finally decide to have a little medical marijuana to see if it would help my guts. I used the vaporizor and just used a little bit. I didn't want to get high, I was afraid I might dwell on my situation too much and feel like doom and gloom. But a couple of good things happened. Within a couple of minutes, I was ready to raid the fridge, my appetite was real strong, and I was put in a good mood and enjoyed watching a movie with Beth. The appetite helped to eliminate the ill feeling and my mind was taken off the little pain like jabs that tend to hit all over my abdomen. Another point of interest as a result, I ate half of a pomegranate, or the seeds if you will, and today the pressure in my chest has been reduced to where I hardly notice it. Now I am not too sure if there is a correlation, but Dr. Sodhi had been recommending drinking 100% pomegranate juice for the medical benefits. He said it was a good blood purifyer, body alkalyzer, and stimulates the immune system, among other benefits such as liver and kidney support. I bought the juice a few weeks back but didn't care to drink it. While eating the fruit is a bit messy, I like consuming it more that way then drinking the juice. As for the marijuana, my lungs feel fine today but I will leave it as a just need basis. My head needs to stay focused and I haven't cared for the high marijuana or opiate based pain killers bring. A far cry from the college party days! But, the head stays much more positive for me when not altered. I even talked to the radiologist folks today about not having to take the valium in the morning for the PET/CT scan. I can handle a half hour in the tube without sedatives. The important thing was I wanted a more productive afternoon then being sedated. I think I will be leaving the tube with a positive attitude and a renewed sense of kicking cancer butt. With that kind of energy, I want to do something, maybe take Beth to lunch and come back and do more work. Colds are floating around the office this week so working at home will have to suffice.

So I have been busy with emails and getting caught up with friends and family. The holidays brought many rumors of my situation and I have been getting people I didn't contact before caught up. For those of you that have recently learned about my fight, I am sorry you have to deal with the shock during what its supposed to be a joyful time. Well, its still joyful, I am alive and determined as ever to stay that way. I am glad you have now come to join my community of support and have added your prayers and positive energy. There is 2 things I have come to believe. One is with so many prayers being said on my behalf, one of them is going to get answered, thank you. The other is with all the positive energy getting sent my way, there is no way any kind of cancer can survive that kind of loving onslaught! I am lucky, even now, to have you on my side and looking out for me. And, I am certainly glad to be humble enough to recognize it. So there is still a lot to by joyful about and since life is so short, lets not waste a bit of it...